You are the Prime Minister of Australia – For One Day Only

Today’s Guest Poster is the magnificent Puffy The Magic Dragon, who – as always – has come up with a topic guaranteed to put fire in the belly (and even out of the mouth). Thank you so much, Puffy.

Also, I apologise for my lack of activity for the past few weeks. I am sure you all understand.

Photo credit: Wikimedia Commons

Hats off to Mr Steve Georganas MP, Federal Member for Hindmarsh, House of Reps. ALP.

Steve Geoganas, a thoroughly good bloke, recently attached a questionaire to his newsletter, for people in his electorate, asking about issues and concerns they may have.

As well as keeping in touch with his electorate and proactively seeking their input, his survey finished with an interesting question that I have not seen before in such an exercise.

‘What would you do if you were Prime Minister for one day.’

What an intriguing thought. What would I do?

I would:

  • Close Manus Island and Nauru camps and order repatriation to Australia of the people interned there.
  • Establish royal commissions into the banks, and another into our involvement into the Iraq WMD war. And Children Overboard, and the rest of that can of maggots. Chuck one in for political donations too, while we are at it.
  • Stop the Adani coalmine.

Because I will get to work early on my day, it will only be morning tea-time.

  • I will have plenty of time to fix the NBN fiasco, and then after lunch with Indigenous people’s representatives to nut out a plan to really address inequities, roll my sleeves up for a late nighter.

There is so much more.

  • Also, I would implement the ALP Animal Welfare plan, and designate theft of pets as an act of national harm, punishable by ten years of cleaning up doggy doo doo.

What would you do?

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1,133 thoughts on “You are the Prime Minister of Australia – For One Day Only

  1. CON hold Saffron Walden
    LAB hold Chester
    LAB hold slough
    LAB hold Stalybridge and Hyde
    Lab hold Oldham west and royton
    CON hold Newark
    LAB hold Brent Central
    LAB hold Vauxhall

  2. Well, I hope Scotland are happy with themselves. From what it seems, they seem to have given the Conservatives the last few seats they need to hold a relatively safe coalition government with the Irish Unionists.

    Speaking of NI, it seems the SDLP (Irish Labour) has been wiped out, losing its only 3 seats.

  3. CON hold Suffolk central and Ipswich North
    LAB hold Birmingham Perry Bar
    CON hold Altrincham and Sale West
    CON hold Stone
    CON hold Thornbury and Yate
    LAB gain Weaver vale from con
    CON hold Maidstone and the weald
    CON hold Witham
    CON hold Sleaford and North Hykeham
    LAB hold Lancaster and Fleetwood
    CON hold Bexhill and Battle
    LAB hold Stretford and Urmston
    CON gain Berwickshire and Roxborough from SNP
    LAB hold Ashton under Lyne

  4. CON hold Richmond (Yorks)
    CON hold Haltemprice and Howden
    CON hold Shrewsbury and Atcham
    CON gain Aberdeenshire west and Kincardine from SNP
    CON gain Stirling from SNP

  5. Total seats won
    475 of 650 seats declared at 9 Jun 04.00 BST

    Con
    207
    (-10)

    Lab
    209
    (+23)

    LD
    10
    (+5)

    SNP
    29

    (-14)
    DUP
    10 (+2)

    Others
    10

    Latest declarations
    Theresa May holds Maidenhead with a 45.4% majority 3 minutes ago
    Con hold Weston-Super-Mare with a 20.5% majority 3 minutes ago
    Lib Dem win Edinburgh West with a 5.7% majority 3 minutes ago

    Key seats
    Theresa May holds Maidenhead with a 45.4% majority 3 minutes ago
    Lib Dem win Edinburgh West with a 5.7% majority 3 minutes ago
    Con win Berwickshire, Roxburgh & Selkirk with a 17.9% swing 3 minutes ago
    )
    (Guardian

  6. 😦 Cons have for the first time today have more seats than Labour, 224 vs 220

  7. LAB gain warrington south from CON
    SF gain Fermanagh and South Tyrone from UUP
    CON gain Mansfield from LAB
    CON hold Cambridgeshire NE
    LAB hold Brent North
    SNP hold Edinburgh North and Leith
    CON hold Welwyn Hatfield
    LAB hold Dulwich and West Norwood
    SNP hold Motherwell and Wishaw
    LAB hold Luton South
    CON hold Penrith and the Border
    CON hold Congleton
    CON hold Bromley and Chislehurst
    SNP hold Livingston
    LAB hold Huddersfield
    LAB gain Reading East from CON
    CON hold Rossendale and Darwen
    SNP hold Ayrshire Central
    CON hold Aylesbury
    CON hold Eddisbury
    LAB hold Derby South
    CON hold Norfok SW
    LAB hold Edinburgh South
    CON hold Devon SW
    CON hold Daventry
    CON hold Surrey SW
    SNP hold Ross Skye and Lochaber

  8. CON hold Thanet South
    CON hold Banbury
    CON hold Brigg and Goole
    CON hold Poole
    CON hold York Outer
    CON hold Herefordshire North
    LAB hold Bradford East
    CON hold Devon East
    CON hole Rochester and Strood
    CON hold Broxtowe
    Con hold Hertfordshire SE
    SNP hold Edinburgh SW
    CON Hold chetlenham
    LAB hold Bolsover
    CON gain gordon from SNP (Alex Salmond defeated)

  9. CON hold Gillingham and Rainham
    CON hold Leicestershire South
    CON hold Kingswood
    LAB hold Holborn and St Pancras
    LAB hold Dewsbury
    CON hold Corby
    CON hold Chatham and Aylesford
    LAB gain Plymouth Sutton and Devonport from CON
    CON hold Old Bexley and Sidcup
    Lab hold Blyth Valley

  10. CON hold Tatton
    CON hold Milton Keynes South
    CON hold Shipley
    CON hold Dorset Mid and Poole North
    LAB hold Denton and Reddish
    CON hold Elmet and Rothwell
    CON hold Morecambe and Lunesdale

  11. CON hold Derbyshire Mid
    CON hold Yorkshire East
    LAB hold Hampstead and Kilburn

  12. I am surprised at the SNP wipeout. Perhaps Scottish voters don’t want to leave the United Kingdom

    How many voters in each electorate in the UK, looks like Maidenhead has about 100,000 voters

    According to a Buzzfeed graphic – see below, Labour would be winning up until quite late then the Tories will win the last seats, but winning 2 out 3 of the undeclared seats looks like a big ask. 5:44am British Time is about 14:44 Australian Time

  13. LAB hold Stoke on Trent North
    CON Hold Beckenham
    CON hold Filton and Bradley Stoke

  14. I’m going to finish for a little while before my pay as you go internet runs out.

  15. Con hold Meon Valley with a 47.4% majority 4 minutes ago
    Con hold Plymouth Moor View with a 11.0% majority 6 minutes ago
    Con hold Cambridgeshire South East with a 25.6% majority 6 minutes ago

    Key seats
    Liam Fox holds Somerset North with a 27.6% majority 8 minutes ago
    Con hold Northampton South with a 2.8% majority 11 minutes ago
    Con hold Northampton North with a 2.0% majority 12 minutes ago

  16. 4.45am UK time

    85 seats left to count

    570 of 650 seats declared at 9 Jun 04.44 BST

    Con
    270
    (-11)

    Lab
    236
    (+29)

    LD
    10
    (+4)

    SNP
    33
    (-18)

    DUP
    10 (+2)

    Others
    11
    68.47% turnout

    Latest declarations
    Lab hold Edmonton with a 48.3% majority a couple of minutes ago
    Con hold Cheadle with a 8.3% majority 4 minutes ago
    Con hold Halesowen & Rowley Regis with a 11.8% majority 4 minutes ago

    Key seats
    Con win Banff & Buchan with a 19.1% swing 5 minutes ago
    Liam Fox holds Somerset North with a 27.6% majority 10 minutes ago
    Con hold Northampton South with a 2.8% majority 13 minutes ago

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