The truly magnificent John Birmingham has decided to adopt the spirit of gonzo with a subscriber-only play-list. He’s also generously letting recipients post choice bits with the appropriate attributions. So, this is one that definitely caught my attention, and here’s the link: https://gumroad.com/l/aliensideboob
You read this hours before the coronation of an unstable, man-sized shard of penis brittle as the rape-clown-in-chief of the free world. Look around you. The best lack all conviction, while the worst are full of Red Bull and cannibal meth. This surely was a week to ponder what rough beast, its hour come round at last, slouches towards Washington to be born.
Perhaps it’ll be just like the final episode of Buffy, Season 3, when the Mayor turned into a giant demon snake and tried to eat all the guests. That would be cool, because our very own Senator Malcolm Roberts will be there to represent Pauline Hanson and the seventy-seven lackwits who drooled directly into the ballot box on his behalf. I would totally get up at three in the morning to watch Senator Roberts eaten by an enormous coil of writhing bowel wearing Donald Trump’s face and a burning haystack in place of a hairpiece. Sadly, just because something should happen doesn’t mean it will.
I tell my doctor that every time he rings to pester me about my overdue prostate exam.
Roberts and Hanson trolled everyone like champions earlier in the week, fanning themselves with their golden tickets to the crowning of Baron Fuckface von Clownstick as King o’ the World. One Nation’s Borg Queen twittered like a schoolgirl about being gifted her invite, while Roberts gave the impression he was grinning like your Uncle Bob with a permawoody from mail-order horse viagra.
“Pauline and I received an invitation, but not the Prime Minister,” tweeted the Lesser Malcolm. “OUCH”.
Cool story, bro.
So much cooler than some desperate fuckdiggler ringing the Aussie embassy again and again begging them to hook him up. Turned out the whole thing was such a fanwank plea-bargain that even the Republican congressman who eventually gave up the tickets felt the need to explainify his role in adding to the number of feral swamp donkeys in the national capitol tomorrow.
“Wait? What? Steve Irwin’s not coming?” he said.
Why do they do this? Why drop your pants, massage your buttocks with premium cold-pressed olive oil and stand glistening in the bright sun waiting for the giant Dildo of Consequences to ramify the outcomes of your poor choices? And ramify them HARD.
It’s a valid question, innit, guv? One the Greater Malcolm might consider as the prime ministerial bottom burns red and ever-so-gently quivers in anticipation of the fearful consequences that must come its way when his debt collectors start going after retirees.
Yes. That’s right. Having started the year with a jumbo-sized bowl of piping hot flop sweat, the bunglecunt messiah this week went back for sloppy seconds on the #notmydebt clusterfuckola, describing his government’s aggressive pursuit of billions of dollars it wasn’t owed as “responsible and appropriate.”
Remember that as you reflect on the poor choices made by the Lesser Malcolm, who was at least punching up. Or trying to.
The imperial bellends who actually reign over you did much worse things this week than pathetically bigging up their sixth degree of separation from Baron von Clownstick. They moved to widen the search for people who didn’t owe them any money from the mentally handicapped and unemployed to the nation’s millions of pensioners. Why? Because those greedy old fuckers have been living the honkey rich life on the premium tins of dog food and store brand colostomy bags at Aldi while our poor and hungry fucking trough monsters in Canberra have had to travel business class to each other’s wedding and polo orgies.
Business class!
Do you know how embarrassing that is when Lord Rupert screams past you in his personal jet?
Again, why would anyone who gets elected for a living do this? It can’t just be because kicking over some doddering wrinklies’ walking frames and mugging them for their carefully hoarded stash of dog food money is easier than going after scary-looking welfare moochers with their Celtic tatts and angry twitter feeds.
There has to be something deep at work. Something more primal.
And there is. Stupidity.
But not just old fashioned everyday stupidity. Not just common folly and garden variety derp.
No, this is a sort of amplified neo-stupidity. It’s a shameless stupidity that revels in its own asshat-on-backwards majesty. It’s networked and self-reinforcing. It’s stupidity as an accelerating feedback loop. The kind of stupid that argues for guns in schools to protect against grizzly bear attacks. The kind of stupid that insists, po-faced and pantsless, as Resources Minister Matt Canavan did on Tuesday, that we can reduce our carbon emissions from coal fired power stations by building more coal fired power stations. The kind of stupid that took such a fearful fucking beatdown from the last two weeks of #notmydebtpocalypse that it decides hitting itself in the head with a hammer wasn’t good enough. It should really frappe its own nads and knob cheese in a giant blender too. Because what could possibly go wrong feeding a couple of million pensioners into the trenches of Centrelink’s gigantinormous robot war?
That’s the kinda stupid I’m talkin’ about.
And tomorrow it wears a crown.
Good morning Dawn Patrollers.
Here we go! Trump’s executive order closing the nation’s borders to refugees was put into immediate effect on Friday night. Refugees who were in the air on the way to the United States when the order was signed were stopped and detained at airports. The ACLU and others have signalled that there will be an immediate legal challenge.
http://www.smh.com.au/world/refugees-detained-at-us-airports-as-donald-trumps-antimuslim-executive-order-comes-into-force-20170128-gu0p5o.html
Iraqi and Afghan refugees who devoted years of their lives to helping the U.S. war efforts were detained Friday night at U.S. airports due to President Donald Trump’s executive order targeting Muslims and refugees attempting to enter the country.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com.au/2017/01/28/iraqis-who-spent-years-helping-u-s-among-the-first-detained-und/?utm_hp_ref=au-homepage
A radicalised white supremacist who was stockpiling homemade guns and weapons across Sydney had expressed an intention to commit a mass shooting at a popular Westfield shopping centre. I suppose he calls himself a REAL Australian.
http://www.smh.com.au/nsw/white-supremacist-threatened-to-shoot-up-sydney-shopping-centre-20170120-gtvod0.html
“Australia first” is opportunism and politicians should be careful where it leads.
https://www.theguardian.com/australia-news/commentisfree/2017/jan/28/australia-first-is-opportunism-and-politicians-should-be-careful-where-it-leads
Mark Kenny muses that perhaps Turnbull is the right man in the wrong job.
http://www.theage.com.au/federal-politics/political-news/perhaps-malcolm-turnbull-is-the-right-man-in-the-wrong-job-20170126-gtz5hc.html
The Nats seem to have Gladys Berekilian’s measure already.
http://www.smh.com.au/nsw/anthony-roberts-brad-hazzard-take-key-roles-in-gladys-berejiklian-reshuffle-20170128-gu0m0b.html
Turnbull was confident about the TPP too. How will he go with Trump on the refugee deal?
http://www.smh.com.au/federal-politics/political-news/malcolm-turnbull-confident-about-us-refugee-deal-despite-trump-order-20170128-gu0kze.html
Australia’s refugee deal in jeopardy after Trump’s ‘extreme vetting’ order
https://www.theguardian.com/australia-news/2017/jan/28/australias-refugee-deal-in-jeopardy-after-trumps-extreme-vetting-order
Donald Trump’s surprise election in the United States has given the political right around the world new affirmation and new confidence. And it’s affecting Austrian politics.
http://www.smh.com.au/comment/far-out-the-right-renews-its-challenge-20170127-gu08r2.html
Donald Trump is delusional and utterly obsessed with himself, and this is a danger to the world according to this article in The Independent Australia.
https://independentaustralia.net/politics/politics-display/me-the-people-narcissist-president-donald-trump-rewrites-the-us-constitution,9971
Section 2 . . .
The federal government will be forced to lift its own self-imposed credit limit in the coming months as debt hurtles towards half-a-trillion dollars – almost double the number the Coalition inherited from Labor. Stand by for a surfeit of weasel words and Labor blame. But the Coalition’s own words will come back to bite them,
http://www.theage.com.au/federal-politics/political-news/scott-morrison-to-lift-credit-limit-as-australias-debt-hurtles-towards-500-billion-20170128-gu0iin.html
Paul McGeough on Trump’s impending phone call to Putin.
http://www.smh.com.au/world/nice-media-conference-but-the-trumpputin-agenda-dwarfs-theresa-mays-todo-list-20170128-gu0k3s.html
Amongst other wise reforms to the Environmental Protection Act, Victoria will also protect lives by bringing health expertise into the EPA, write Dr David Shearman and Dr Karen Kiang from Doctors for the Environment Australia.
https://independentaustralia.net/life/life-display/-victoria-shows-the-way-to-better-health-with-reform-of-the-epa,9969
Ben Carson reveals why Trump Republicans hate the American People.
http://thenewdaily.com.au/money/work/2017/01/27/pizza-hut-sham-contracting/
Young Australians are warned to be wary of “sham contracting”, a tactic used by bosses to save money, after the exposure of a “shocking” underpayment scandal at Pizza Hut.
http://thenewdaily.com.au/money/work/2017/01/27/pizza-hut-sham-contracting/
Annabel Crabbe welcomes Gladys to the “public cervix”.
http://www.theage.com.au/comment/a-womb-with-a-view-today-20170127-gu037h.html
Two more Nationals have been making a meal of private flights.
http://www.theage.com.au/federal-politics/political-news/two-mps-run-up-200000-tab-on-private-flights-to-work-in-canberra-20170127-gu0817.html
Malia Obama, the daughter of former US president Barack Obama, has been spotted attending a protest against the building of the controversial Dakota Access Pipeline.
http://www.canberratimes.com.au/lifestyle/news-and-views/malia-obama-joins-dakota-access-pipeline-protest-at-sundance-20170127-gu0hbe.html
FoxNews becomes the American Pravda!
http://www.politicususa.com/2017/01/27/friday-fox-follies-in-trump-tv-we-trust.html
Section 3 . . . Cartoon Corner
Cathy Wilcox on what we are all thinking.




Broelman obviously wasn’t impressed with the “new casual” SA Opposition Leader’s TV ad.
Andrew Dyson introduces Trump’s new immigration front line.
Matt Golding with an AO.
Macca inside a Melbourne youth detention centre.
http://cdn.newsapi.com.au/image/v1/339612f54d74e62bbd8fc47772b55422?width=1024
CK
Thanks for the Bill Maher links – especially the monologue!
Here’s the correct link to the Ben Carson item.
http://www.politicususa.com/2017/01/27/opinion-ben-carson-reveals-trump-republicans-hate-american-people.html
Yes, she really did say this. Shealso seems to think Captain Cook and the First Fleet arrived together. She is also worried about the ‘hurt and pain’ felt by convicts ‘torn away from their countries’. The bleeding obvious – many of them had been sentenced to death but had their d=sentences commuted to transportation, saving their lives, has not occurred to her.
Some bloke – Why are we having it on this day, why January 26th?
Hanson, very definite – Because that’s when Captain Cook landed and claimed this country in the name of the British monarch.
If you really want to knock yourself out banging your head into your desk the whole catastrophe is here for 25 January.
http://www.kiis1065.com.au/shows/kyle-jackie-o/
Why did we need to fly two ministers to the US to open a Qantas hangar?
The strange little face of the pansy:
Puffy is having trouble logging on, so she has asked me to put this up:
http://www.zerohedge.com/news/2017-01-28/homeland-confirms-trump-immigration-ban-will-include-green-card-holders
This is slightly concerning, because Kenny has a habit of self-fulfilling his own prophecies, as in:
“I told you it was Turnbull’s big chance… and he took it!”
Sure, Kenny hints that the only possible solution to any of Australia’s problems is for some Liberal to step up to the plate.
However (call me overly sensitive) I also do detect some more grudging admiration for Shorten (vaguer, and less positive than Waterford’s yesterday)… a toe in the water:
Turnbull would be a great politician, if he wasn’t involved in politics. The absurdity of Kenny’s position seems to escape its author.
On the one hand Kenny decries Turnbull’s foray into “politics” (the “crass” preceding it is silent), and by association lets us know he doesn’t think much of politics as a calling… then he concedes Bill is pretty good at it. Turnbull would be better off as, say… President.
Being a Great Statesman (but a lousy politician) is an unfortunate position for Turnbull to be in, for he has taken on – if nothing else – the job of Politician In Chief. Right man, Wrong job. Sadly (for Turnbull) the job IS the job, not some other job.
The wheel turns. Two Canberra insiders have now dared to speculate on Bill Shorten’s suitability for being Prime Minister. Don’t expect these Tory Scribblers to endorse Shorten, or anything silly like that. But I think what we are seeing is the gradual dawning of the realization that Turnbull has not only risen one level too high in the political hierarchy, but that he’s probably in the wrong hierarchy altogether.
Speeches won’t help him (or shouldn’t). Speeches are just words. And we’ve had enough of those out of Malcolm’s mouth to last several lifetimes.
http://www.theage.com.au/federal-politics/political-news/perhaps-malcolm-turnbull-is-the-right-man-in-the-wrong-job-20170126-gtz5hc.html
http://www.zerohedge.com/news/2017-01-28/refugees-racists-out-protestors-storm-jfk-airport-after-trumps-muslim-ban-live-feed
http://www.politico.com/blogs/donald-trump-administration/2017/01/trump-wont-attend-alfalfa-club-dinner-234264
This is where Puffy was ten minutes ago:
http://angryarab.blogspot.com.au/2017/01/your-guide-to-syrian-rebel-groups.html
http://angryarab.blogspot.com.au/2017/01/trump-and-no-checks-on-his-powers.html
http://www.counterpunch.org/2017/01/26/double-standards-where-were-the-liberal-protestors-during-obamas-wars/
http://www.middleeasteye.net/columns/britains-century-long-war-yemen-809826615
I’m not usually into country music, so this is a first for me.
Winner of the Golden Guitar award for best video clip at last night’s CNC awards in Tamworth – O’Shea, with Rob Hirst of Midnight Oil.
The Truth Walks Slowly (In the Countrry).
Those taking an interest in the plight of Australian farmers who are having their land ruined by fracking will know about George Bender and his family’s continuing fight. It’s quite something for such a political song to win this award. Well done to all involved!
https://www.facebook.com/GeorgeBender68/?hc_ref=NEWSFEED&fref=nf
And after all that, here is the right link.
Look at this CNN (Opposition) headline!
Trudeau, you’re the best! I follow you.
Trump’s narcissistic mental defect puts him in the same category as infamous tyrannical dictators like Muammar Gaddafi, Adolf Hitler, and Saddam Hussein say leading US psychologists.
http://www.politicususa.com/2017/01/28/opinion-leading-psychologists-trump-mentally-deranged.html
Trump puts Fizza last.
Trump ends calls to world leaders with PM
http://www.skynews.com.au/news/top-stories/2017/01/29/trump-to-chat-with-turnbull–putin.html
To think that in Libya and Syria Education and Health were free.
Until we liberated it (cough) Iraq gave women 6 months full pay parental leave, women’s equality was enshrined in the constitution and equal pay enforced. Oh and primary health care was free. Before sanctions and invasion they also had the highest literacy rate in the region. Take a bow Bush , Blair and bloody Howard. I’m sure the people of Iraq appreciate your efforts.
Yep.
Before the west interfered women in Iraq had the same education as the men, they could dress any way they liked, Equal rights were the law. Women could run for political office, own property, had maternity leave andcould do anything women in the west could do.
Now all that is gone. Women are now oppressed.
Thank you George W Bush.
I’m not saying Sadam was a good guy, he was not. But don’t believe all the propaganda about how wonderful life is for women in Iraq now Sadam has gone.
Yes, there was persecution, rape and murder under Sadam’s regime, but who are we to point that finger, we who live in a country where more than one woman, every week, is killed by a partner or someone else close to her and where women who are raped are still forced to go through difficult court appearances where personal details of their lives are dragged up in attempts to make out it was all their fault. How can we criticise persecution when this country hounded a female prime minister out of office while our media cheered it on?
I haven’t mentioned the effects of the filthy, illegal war on Iraqi women. That’s a whole other topic, a very unpleasant one.
https://www.rt.com/news/375416-putin-trump-telephone-call/
Yep:
Urbanwronski
Turnbull government a dead parrot as power-crazed Trump cuts loose
https://urbanwronski.com/2017/01/29/turnbull-government-a-dead-parrot-as-power-crazed-trump-cuts-loose/
Nah, Turnbull government is just resting

More like this –
The Guardian says Trump has agreed to honour the refugee deal. No mention of what Turnbull promised in exchange, or if it will ever happen, or when.
A rather stupid article, more about ‘Ciobo says’ than about any deal between Fizza and Trump.
https://www.theguardian.com/australia-news/2017/jan/29/donald-trump-malcolm-turnbull-phone-call-immigration-ban-muslim#comment-92101791
Will Trump decide only Christian refugees will be accepted?
http://edition.cnn.com/2017/01/27/politics/trump-christian-refugees/index.html
Unless you were a Shia or Kurdish woman
Oh and before anyone calls me a neo con, I opposed the Iraq war but I don’t regard Saddam era Iraq as the paradise that the more looney sections of the left believe it was.
It was no paradise that is for sure but it sure as hell didn’t have the religious nutters so far off the leash. GL I think you are on a list of those least likely to suffer from “neoconism” .
We can’t talk. This country’s discrimination against indigenous women and, increasingly, Muslim women is appalling.
Indigenous women die in custody and no-one says a word.
See. Trump DID think the executive order through!
http://linkis.com/WLHrb
I honestly don’t know why anyone is really surprised at this. For the last 16 years people have been pointing out those figures from the CATO Institute quoted in the article. Together with the known proselytising by the Saudi Wahabi sect that has been particularly nasty to anyone who dares challenge their vision of what Islam might be, it surprises me constantly that people from Saudi Arabia are allowed to access the USA so easily. But then I remember that Saudi Arabia is sitting on some of the world’s biggest oil reserves, and I can’t help but wonder how the Koch brothers and their oil company friends will treat the them when those reserves run dry.
https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2017/jan/28/federal-judge-stays-deportations-trump-muslim-executive-order?CMP=Share_iOSApp_Other
NEW POST
Comments here will close very soon.